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My daughter is the center of my universe and I love her more than I knew I could love and you know what?.. At the end of the day, good or bad, fun filled or boring day, I need her to just go. to. sleep (said every parent every night). However, since birth she has had this sense about her where when I REALLY need her to just go to sleep the most, she REALLY just needs to do anything but sleep. I’m sure most parents have experienced this at some point and somehow we all survive. For my family? Sleep and sleeping arrangements have been one of our major struggles since the birth of my daughter.

My daughter is now two and like most parents we have had some waves of basically zero sleep and stretches of time where sleep is so abundant (relatively speaking) we forget about those terrible nights of waking every half an hour. We’ve combated our sleep distress pretty creatively. Our daughter has slept with me mostly. Although she has always had a crib, she has always had a hard time sleeping in it. Recently we have moved on to a toddler bed and she has been dealing with it like a champ. I’ve been holding her hand while she falls asleep and once asleep she sleeps in her bed alone through the night. Things are great! Or they were… until last night.

Last night we went to bed as normal. She climbed into her big girl bed, I tucked her in and she motioned to turn out the light and snuggled her Pooh bear stuffed animal. All was good. As soon as the room got dark it was as if my child was struck by the Energizer Bunny and the wrestling match began! For the next four hours I tried everything I knew how to do. Singing, rocking, stepping away, cuddling, talking, not talking, darkening the room even more by adding a curtain. Nothing worked. Nothing could settle her down to sleep for hours. Finally I laid her in bed next to me and gave her the I mean business (as much as you can to a toddler) talk and cuddled her close until she went to sleep. Sleep she did!

I however feel completely traumatized. I went to sleep feeling like everything I knew was wrong and like I failed, a recurring feeling that always seems to resurface around sleep.

Fast-forward to three years old and we’ve been safely and sanely co-sleeping in the big bed and that is okay. We tried her toddler bed a bit more then had a realization… it doesn’t really matter where everyone sleeps as long as everyone is safe and sleeping. So for now, we are a cosleeping family. I threw my preconceived ideas about not having kids in bed with me out the window and we do what is best for our family. We sleep.

To any other families out there struggling with sleep, I would say find what works for your family, be sure whatever your arrangement everyone e is safe (look up safe sleeping for babies if you are unsure) and don’t worry about what others do or think. Every family is different and thus every families’ sleeping situation will also be different. The important thing is that you and your little ones can be safe and get adequate rest. We’d love to hear how others conquered the sleep battle. What worked? What did not? Did you “sleep train,” cosleep or something else? Please leave a comment and help this conversation!